The Old Pecan and the Sea Literary Cooking Adventure

Once again, we return to the kitchen in a brilliant effort to create another pie. This time, I attempted to tackle the very precarious Butterscotch Pecan Pie. I had some trouble the last time I attempted one several years ago and it almost turned to goo before I froze it, capturing its saccharine essence in solid form. I was hoping that this pecan pie would be a bit easier provided my extensive and disastrous history. I was proven wrong.

As with the banana cream pie, the pie crust decided to be the most obnoxious part of this Cooking Adventure. I had to roll out, shape, pin-prick, and bake 2 in order for it to work. There are apparently very detailed steps one must follow in order to get the perfect pie crust including thawing, unrolling, pressing, pricking, chilling, weighting, and baking…and I didn’t follow them for shit. Sorry, but all of that kagatha just to pre-bake a pie crust seems ridiculous. I should have just done it. Maybe then I wouldn’t have ended up with something that looks like it was made out of sand.

The other thing that really set me off was my inability to open the bag of pecans. I wish I was joking. There’s a segment in the bloopers where I struggle with the bag of pecans for almost a full two minutes before succumbing to rage and hacking it open with a pair of scissors. Then, I couldn’t open the bag of butterscotch chips. It wasn’t my day.

As a tribute to Hemingway’s classic novel, I decided to take a break and cast a line, hoping to hook something good. Instead, I managed to capture the rare but ferocious Lemon Jelly, a cat with an insatiable appetite and primal rage.

Interested in the recipe for this disastrous pie leviathan? Scroll down and behold!

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Just When You Thought It Was Safe To Go Back Into The Watermelon…

LITERARY COOKING ADVENTURE: Jaws

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Yes. I realize that Shark Week was indeed last week. Do I care? Not really.

Last week, I held my third annual Shark Week Party complete with bloody chum-like cocktails, shark-shaped cookies, Goldfish, Sharknado 2, and of course, the Sharktermelon.

Every year so far I’ve carved a shark out of a watermelon following steps that I’ve found on line. This year’s attempt was sadly done in haste as I had run out of time to do it. Nevertheless, it came out looking ten times better than last years, which looked more like a Critter than a shark.

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Fair-Shell And Adieu To You Fair Spanish Ladies!

LITERARY COOKING ADVENTURE: Jaws Part Deux

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As it is Shark Week and one of my favorite films/novels is Jaws by Peter Benchley, I thought it would be fun to not only do a video Cooking Adventure, but also a traditional written account of another dish. Therefore, last night after a long day of work, I put my nose to the grindstone and decided to make a recipe that I’ve had my eye on for some time: Mussels in Garlic White Wine Sauce. Yes… It is as good as it sounds. It should be known that since I have a fear of killing crustaceans/living creatures in the pursuit of cooking, I decided to use frozen mussels. They were still in their shells, in air-tight plastic wrap and were just as good as live ones. I also didn’t have to do any de-bearding or washing which is a plus when you work until late and don’t want to do all of that. I suppose it’s cheating but…I don’t really care.

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The Frost World Jurassic Park Literary Cooking Adventure

Welcome to the Frost World of Jurassic Park! That’s right; this week in celebration of the release of Jurassic World, I decided to do a Jurassic Park themed Cooking Adventure. Michael Crichton is my favorite author and his books are some of the ones that inspired me to start writing in the action/adventure genre.

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Ella Eggplanted Literary Cooking Adventure

I had to obey my inner voice this week. It told me that I had a craving for eggplant (probably the first time that’s ever happened) and that I should find a scrumptious recipe to tackle for this week’s Literary Cooking Adventure. As such, I found a terrific one for some Eggplant Parmesan Boats, which were relatively easy to make and tasted SO GOOD!

Alas, the gift of obeying does not come without its share of frustration, as protagonist Ella found out in Gail Carson Levine’s “Ella Enchanted”. Renegade eggplant escapees, a dastardly onion that refused to be cut, and a pretty bad breakdown while trying to film the intro to the video are only a few of the things that went wrong.

Want to make this spectacular dish for yourself? BEHOLD! Scroll down to find the ingredients and directions!

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The Canterbury Toast Literary Cooking Adventure

On this very impromptu Literary Cooking Adventure, I had a sudden craving for French Toast that really couldn’t be denied. Breakfast is one of the few meals that I get to enjoy as I’m usually going to work or am hip-deep in a project and am entirely engrossed for the remainder of the morning. I decided in lieu of several things to celebrate this month (namely my fourth book being put in print!), that a wonderful stack of French Toast would be just the right thing. Even better? I matched them up with some chocolate chips and blueberries for a very berry Mainer breakfast extravaganza!

As tribute, I decided to dedicate this Cooking Adventure to the supremely skilled author, Oscar Wilde, and one of his well-known short stories, The Canterbury Ghost.

Below are the simple directions for making a stack of your very own delicious Chocolate Blueberry French Toast!

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Pearwell My Lovely Literary Cooking Adventure

It was hot in the city that night; hotter than any day I could remember. I was just closing up the office. It had been a hell of a day and all I could think about was settling into bed and finally catching some sleep. Just then, there was an unexpected knock at my door. I called for them to come in. And there, standing in my door, was the most handsome pizza I’d ever seen in my entire life.

Really though. I think I’ve found my new favorite pizza. Pear Bacon pizza sounds kind of strange, yes, I’ll admit. But, it is mouth-watering, sweet and savory and perfect in every possible way. This sauce-less, artisan pizza was probably one of my favorite literary Cooking Adventures to date. I’ve made it three times now!

Owing to the fact that this was the first time I’d made it, there were a few hitches along the way. In a tribute to Raymond Chandler’s “Farewell My Lovely”, I sauntered into the kitchen and took up my knife and rolling pin, ready to investigate this decadent pie.

Check out the full instructions below on how to craft this Pear Bacon Pizza for yourselves! You can find the original recipe that inspired this one over at Recipe Runner!

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The Princess Pied – Literary Cooking Adventure

Inconceivable!

On this week’s Literary Cooking Adventure, I decided to pay tribute to William Goldman’s masterpiece “The Princess Bride” by concocting a sweet and delicious Snickers Pie. Watch as I encounter AOUS (apples of unusual size), match wits with an over-sized tub of whipped cream (which is Sicilian at heart), and discover that Snickers candies really are the definition of true love.

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The Cauliflower of Cthulhu: Literary Cooking Adventure

After an arduous journey across treacherous terrain, I found myself at my destination: the mountains of madness…and cauliflower.

This week on Literary Cooking Adventures, we’re celebrating H.P. Lovecraft. Watch as I take on what should have been a simple recipe for a cauliflower casserole, negotiating challenging obstacles and insanity in the forms of unbreakable plastic wrap, never-ending water drainage, and the most dangerous of all: the monstrous kitty Cthulhu!

I snagged the original recipe from the Food Network website. Although mine looked nothing like the photo they put up, it still tasted great and I’d definitely make it again.

Want to make this delicious recipe for yourself? Check out the ingredients and directions below!

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Fin City: A Dame to Grill For LITERARY Cooking Adventure

In the dark and winter-ruled city, I had grown mad from the snow, and the darkness and the cold. I needed to feel refreshed, needed some hint of spring to remind me that the world needn’t be constantly swept in shadows…

Ahem. Well…that is…I decided to leap into action and make some lovely grilled fish tacos on a dreary March day a few weeks ago and they were SUPERB! In a tribute to Frank Miller’s Sin City graphic novels, I donned some makeup, slicked my hair back, and got to work in the kitchen. I dealt with a rather unforgiving lime that was not in the mood to be juiced, some frozen fish trapped in a bag that wouldn’t open, and of course, battled the all powerful grill pan as it viciously spat oil at me.

All in a days work though. The fish tacos were wonderful.

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